Metaphorical cats and mystical cats.
Political cats.
Welcome to watch Mojo, and today we're counting down our
picks for the most abysmal early scenes in film that
had us all questioning whether or not to stick around.
Major spoilers to come.
Does your thing really stand for OLD?
Yes, it does, but it looks like an S #10A
tale of two brothers.
Super Mario Brothers.
A long, long time ago, the Earth was ruled by
dinosaurs.
They were big, so not a lot of people went
around hassling them.
This infamous adaptation of one of the most iconic video
game series had a lot of issues.
From its poor writing to its infidelity to its video
game source material, it's no wonder this 90s adaptation was
a box office flop.
By far the worst part of the film, however, is
its exposition rife Beginning.
What if the impact of that meteorite created a parallel
dimension?
Don Castle Annetta, in a bad Brooklyn accent, explains how
the world split into two dimensions after the meteor killed
the dinosaurs.
In fact, some of the surviving dinosaurs go off to
establish, we kid you not, Dino Hatton.
And then we get to see a fully human baby
Daisy hatching from an egg.
Yeah, we're going to pass #9 Facing Ghostface, Scream 4,
I dare you to open the door.
No, Sherry, don't.
No, don't.
I'm scared.
We hate to admit it, but there is such a
thing as being too meta.
In this opening scene, Ghostface calls Facebook stalks and kills
2 characters, Jenny Randall and Marnie Cooper.
A very typical, if indifferently executed horror movie trope.
Except, as it turns out, these are characters of Stab
6 in an in universe sequel.
It's not aliens or zombies or little Asian ghost girls.
There's something real about a guy with a knife who
just The characters watching Stab 6 then get killed by
characters of Stab 7, which reviewed by the characters of
Finally Scream 4.
This meta film within a film within a film serves
to satirize Hollywood's penchant for endless sequels and remix.
But it's illogical.
It begs the question that if the beginning of step
7 is step 6, then is the beginning of step
six Step 5?
And if so, what is Step 4 about?
Scream 4 is viewed as better than its sequels, but
this routine starter is less clever than lazy #8 Superman's
awkward interview.
Justice League, can we ask you some questions?
It's for a podcast.
Well, in that case, how many people that you saved
have you saved?
The greatly anticipated Justice League unfortunately suffered from a clash
of directorial visions.
This is apparent in the film's awkward opening scene, which
begins with a kid interviewing Superman and the superheroes.
Cornball explanation on the meaning of the S symbol.
But it looks like an S Yes, it's meant to.
It's meant to wind like a river.
It comes and goes.
Although it's nice to see Superman taking time to make
a kid happy, the scene seems to serve no purpose
other than to call back to the classic Superman we
all know.
It also contradicts and walks back on Zack Snyder's grittier
take on Superman in earlier films, which had inspired controversy.
We'll all have to pass what is What's the best
thing about planet earth #7 Outworlds, Hilariously bad invasion?
Mortal Kombat?
Annihilation.
It's the cheesy special effects that did it for us,
and the poor editing and the stilted acting and writing.
You get the idea.
No one will accuse this film of being a masterpiece
for the ages, but it's opening scene is definitely a
bewildering eyesore.
In this scene, villainous outworlders have come with the Emperor
announcing his intentions to invade and conquer the Earth in
seven days.
The Earth Realms warriors fight against them, but with one
major casualty, Johnny Cage, who did warn us this would
not be good.
Another video game adaptation Misfire.
We're only glad to see that it's a comedic one.
If unintentionally you're alive, too bad you will die.
Number six, A real catastrophe.
Cats.
Les Miserables may have survived the gritty and overly literal
approach to adapting a stage musical, but this musical about
talking and singing British cats should not even have been
tried.
In this scene we are introduced to the world of
Jellicle cats, where young cat Victoria is dumped in an
alley by humans.
Talk about letting the cat out of the bag.
Why you tense when you sense there's a storm in
the air.
Victoria is adopted by the rest of the Jellicle Cats
who are preparing for the Jellicle Ball.
Director Tom Hooper took the uncanny valley route with CGI
induced skin tight fur, bodies, tails and humanoid hands.
It's strange and off putting, and unfortunately, it only gets
worse from here #5 Lori defenestrated Halloween Resurrection The beginning
of this Halloween sequel is indeed a tough one to
take.
Lori Strode, now a patient in Grace Anderson's sanitarium, has
learned that she has failed to kill the real Michael
Myers, her victim being an innocent paramedic.
The real Michael Myers has returned for Laurie and kills
her.
Not only is it a cheap fate for such a
major character, the execution is lousy as hell.
It turns out that Jimmy Lee Curtis, chagrined that the
Riders were not allowed to kill Myers per Claws, agreed
to come back for Resurrection on the condition that her
character get axed.
Perhaps this was for the best, as Resurrection is deemed
one of the worst films of the franchise.
I'll see you in hell #4 And then the Fire
Nation attacked the Last Airbender.
We wish we could blame the Fire Nation for this
game Night.
Shyamalan's film adaptation of the iconic animated series has too
many sins to count, but by far the worst of
them is the exposition dump of an intro scene.
Unlike the succinct economy of the original series, the film's
intro includes not only a text scrawl, but Katara's droning
voice over narration that goes on and on.
The Avatar was the only person born amongst all the
nations who can master all four elements.
He was the only one who could communicate with the
spirit world.
Even after ANG is found in the iceberg, the film's
tendency for needless exposition and explaining its complicated lore continues.
The lackluster acting and the disappointing special effects does not
help matters either.
I was just upset, Thanks for saving me.
Lucky, I probably should get home #3 The T800 killed
John Connor.
Terminator Dark Fate Speaking of legacy characters being done dirty,
this death was particularly egregious.
After surviving the events of Terminator 2 and destroying Skynet,
Sarah and her son John retired to Guatemala.
Their idol is quickly ended when a random T800 sent
by Skynet easily kills John.
Screw you two movie.
This is a reboot clearly, but the wanton approach approach
of a major character to make way for another chosen
one is not the way to do it.
Sure enough, Dark Fate suffered a dark fate in angering
fans and becoming a box office bomb.
At least the de aging technology here is impressive.
A machine took him from me and I am terminated
#2 Ellen Ripley was the sole survivor.
Alien 3.
This poor woman can't catch a break, and neither can
we.
After the events in Aliens, Ellen Ripley and her crew
enter hypersleep on board the spaceship Sulaco.
But once they crash land on Fury 161 and are
rescued by officers, Ripley learns the hard truth yet again.
She is the only survivor out of all her crew.
Where are the others?
They didn't make it what they didn't survive.
It's a bleak opening to be sure, and it just
so happens to be the same one as in Aliens.
That's right, Ellen is once again in the same position
as she was in the previous movie.
Even more problematic, fan favorite characters such as Newt and
Hicks are dead, and for no good reason.
It's a bad beginning for Ripley and fans alike.
Since I'm not a complete idiot, would you like to
tell me what we're really looking for before we continue?
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Number one, young Indy is Uncanny Valley Indiana Jones in
the Dial of Destiny.
Where to begin with this one?
In this prologue, a young Indiana Jones is taken prisoner
by the Nazis while trying to retrieve the Lance of
Longinus, only to discover it's the Archimedes Dial that's the
real treasure.
It's a fake.
From the dark lighting, the execrable dialogue, the fact that
young Indy is the survivor of both hanging and a
bomb, it's a mess.
The de aging technology is not as bad as it
could have been, but coupled with Ford's gruff grandpa voice,
it's also a miss.
We've got a lot of nice stuff, other people's stuff.
Dial of Destiny doesn't get much better from there and
became a box office flop.
It's quite a poor beginning and end for this legacy
character.
Come on, Baz, let's get home.
Which other opening scenes gave you grim premonitions of the
film's dark fate?
Let us know in the comments below.
Once I saved 3 billion lives, but I couldn't save
my son.
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